I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
