u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Randomize