so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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