haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
