Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Randomize
