Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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