Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Are my feet made of real feet?
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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