The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
