You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Randomize
