And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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