They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
