Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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