Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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