in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
30+ People Share Their Worst ‘Intimate Experience’ And They’re Traumatizing
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head