I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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