I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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