I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
