ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
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