Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
