well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
