My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
