Texts From Last Night

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  (917): View more from New York City

  There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Aren't all three of those the same though?

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  (917): There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it? (504): Aren't all three of those the same though? http://tfl.nu/bg7f
  Replies (2) Good night (1152) Bad night (493)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot

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  (904): at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot http://tfl.nu/zopv
  Replies (60) Good night (869) Bad night (3942)
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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.

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  (662): They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say. http://tfl.nu/fs2e
  Replies (70) Good night (10367) Bad night (1274)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.

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  (734): You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom. http://tfl.nu/aenv
  Replies (34) Good night (3730) Bad night (1262)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .

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  (317): I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket . http://tfl.nu/mvi5
  Replies (59) Good night (6708) Bad night (738)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.

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  (414): My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday. http://tfl.nu/h79n
  Replies (10) Good night (4248) Bad night (1027)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina

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  (763): i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina http://tfl.nu/awuu
  Replies (30) Good night (939) Bad night (7734)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.

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  (843): Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean. http://tfl.nu/s35t
  Replies (9) Good night (4680) Bad night (1084)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?

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  (330): Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch? http://tfl.nu/ae8u
  Replies (6) Good night (3170) Bad night (974)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer

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  (313): I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer http://tfl.nu/w7yv
  Replies (8) Good night (2209) Bad night (892)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes

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  (618): You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes http://tfl.nu/5pp7
  Replies (6) Good night (2756) Bad night (987)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.

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  (269): We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all. http://tfl.nu/epk0
  Replies (4) Good night (1815) Bad night (796)
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  (626): View more from California

  Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...

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  (626): Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything... http://tfl.nu/rago
  Replies (19) Good night (2900) Bad night (748)
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor

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  (705): Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor http://tfl.nu/ic3x
  Replies (3) Good night (392) Bad night (893)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs

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  (918): i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs http://tfl.nu/moe6
  Replies (2) Good night (464) Bad night (304)

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