New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
