it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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