SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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