Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
