People with herpes should wear stickers.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
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