i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
