brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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