I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
