I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
