The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
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