He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
