i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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