Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
