At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize