3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that