either way he was missing a nipple.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
