OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
