Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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