I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
