all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Randomize
