NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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