is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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