dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize