I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize