I hate all girls vehemently.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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