I smell stomach acid.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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