He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I love how my cats smell like pot.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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