Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
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