My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
